It’s 2 o’clock in the morning and with the help of my steroids and the excitement of the evening ahead sleep is escaping me. The memories of yesterday’s medication mishap is weighing heavily on my mind as a recall my stupidity.
My journey since diagnosis has served me well in reminding and highlighting the spirit and wonder of the human race. I believe, that we are all here to play our own unique and very special part in its growth and evolution.
Survival as a species is our ultimate goal and to do this we need certain needs to be met. The physical needs of shelter, water, food and oxygen and a number of mental health needs that I have put together in an acronym to help me to remember. L.A.M.B.S.S.
Love – for each other, ourselves, the world
Autonomy – a sense of control
Meaning & purpose – an aim. goals, aspirations
Belonging – part of a community, family, group, faith
Status – a sense of value, importance
Security – relationship, financial
Imagine these in cups and that these containers are filled in equal amounts, not always to the top, but as high as possible in equal amounts. Where a cup is falling short is the area we need to concentrate on filling if, I believe, we are to be to be truly mentally healthy.
Naturally we will go out and try and fill these cups somehow for our survival.
I use this analogy in my work with children and parents and together we carry out a LAMBSS audit and look for internal and external resources to help get these needs met.
Just think for a moment about teenage pregnancy, which has been on the rise despite much increased sex education provided in schools at earlier stages. Many of the young people I have met know the mechanics but chose ‘not to not’ become pregnant because consciously or subconsciously having a baby would provide some of the LAMBSS naturally required. Maybe a baby could provide that sense of control, love, a meaning or purpose, a sense of value, security, belonging? If we as adults can’t help to fill those gaps by other means this may seem like a perfect option, (as adults we may think otherwise) does that make sense to you?
How about the teenager meeting at the corner of our street in a gang, taking drugs as a way of feeling is if they belong or have status ? See where I’ m coming from?
Look at your cups, are there any that need topping up? Any goals need exploring or relationships needing to be formed? (the brain doesn’t like to be bored it needs exercising, and we all need to feel we belong somewhere) worth a think maybe?
These are just ideas to explore and consider when thinking about how and why we may operate.
Talking about the wonder of the human spirit, this week I was overwhelmed by yet again the kindness shown by the people around me. A small group of ladies (there may have been some men in the mix too?) met secretly to plan an event to raise money for and raise awareness of Multiple Myeloma, the incurable cancer that has recently wormed its way into my vocabulary and bones. A concert, an auction, a raffle, a spectacular event in my honour. Just the thought of human kindness is almost too much to bare as I am so deeply touched.
How amazing is that!
I had been dreaming of having a big summer party to celebrate my 50th and it looks like the two may come together. A big party in the barns with live music, eating al fresco, drinking cool beer or Pimms in the summer sun. Dancing the night away among wild flowers in the fields and barns next to my little spot of paradise at home in the country. Our own Hinxworth festival. Now I wonder if Jarvis is free that day? I have also found a local band that I love the sound of.
Have a listen to the CCsmugglers http://www.ccsmugglers.co.uk/
A bit of country rhythm and blues in our own backyard that would be just too good to be true surely?
Life just got a whole lot better.
Go out today and see the beauty in the world around you. Among all the doom and gloom spread across our daily papers and on our news screens it is there, shinning brightly just take a moment to really see it.
Have a good day!
Next post – hot date exploits revealed!