July 23rd – Day 13

Good morning.. I am delighted to report that my health is definitely improving. I even managed to eat a little yesterday including one of these very special, handmade, individually wrapped, toffee’s from Fortnum and Mason. Thank you once again Sharon for such a thoughtful gift. Besides the excitement of receiving a parcel from such an exclusive shop, the treacle toffee brought back such happy memories of bonfire nights at the Cocker’s. Sitting under the big willow tree with Jarvis, Saskia and Kate and enjoying the homemade sweets and the warmth of the fire on a bitterly cold evening in Sheffield.
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I feel a little hungry this morning and was quite looking forward to my Rice Krispies only to be reminded that I was nil by mouth! I have a scan of my liver booked for 10am.
Although I am feeling a little brighter my temperature is still spiking and I continue to have diarrhoea. I am also still on oxygen so until these issues are addressed there is no talk of coming home I am afraid. After 13 days of sitting in the same room I am ready to move on. Still I will use this time wisely and try to slowly mobilise myself. My body is very weak and my muscles have deteriorated somewhat but I think a little gentle exercise will help improve matters. The physiotherapist is due to pop by today as is the dietician so I will listen carefully to there advice.

Thank you for all your comments. I am sorry I haven’t got around to individually responding to them all, but I can promise you that they have all been read and very much appreciated by both Colin and I.

You really are a great army to have on one’s side.

Lots of love Deborah xxx

No health and safety rules back then!

Yesterday Jarvis kindly sent and old photo he had come across of is both playing on some sort of rubbish tip, probably in the back yard. We could only be about four or five. How times have changed. We obviously didn’t come to any harm and it looks like we were having fun. I haven’t changed much as I still enjoy rummaging around looking for exciting things to turn into some kind of art project, although I really ought to sort out the piles of eclectic pieces I have collected over the years and have a good sort out.

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Receiving the photo and email really cheered me up during our 9½ hour stint at the hospital yesterday. The time was also broken up by a relaxing aromatherapy shoulder massage carried out by the complimentary therapist at the Macmillan Centre within the cancer unit. However towards the end of the day as the rush hour time approached we were both getting pretty frustrated and were definitely ready to come home. a delicious shepherdis pie awaiting thanks to Kate and one of her 15 minutes recipes.  15 minutes doesn’t relate to the time it must have taken to prepare and cook our much appreciated supper, but to Kate and Anna’s successful healthy eating programme. The girls who have already taken part in last years successful 12 week programme have shared their experiences and amazing changes to their relationship with food and as a consequence they have all lost an amazing amount of weight.

The programme includes individual coaching, cooking together days, group support and a sharing of recipe ideas put together by experts in nutrition. Kate has also started to write some interesting and informative Podcasts.

There are no diets, no pills, no meal replacements and no calorie counting. No food is banned and you can have it all, just not all of it – all of the time!

Find out how using coaching and the latest nutritional research The 15 Minutes can help you to lose weight and keep it off forever at:www.the15mins.com  

I don’t apologise if this is a repeat of something written about this in a previous blog, because anything worth doing is worth shouting about, in my book (or in this case Blog).

Today Kate is accompanying me to the hospital but we shall stop off at the Cancer Hair care charity for a spot of pampering. All these little extra’s charity run services and the care shown really do make a difference to those who find themselves living with Cancer. Anything that can make the emotional experience feel slightly more bearable does, I believe, have a direct link with the physical working of the body and helps to hammer those cancer cells back down again. This time around I have leant to take all the help I can get.

Today may be another very long day but Kate and I will make the best of it and Colin will have a break and the time to work on some of the many projects coming our way.

I hope your days a good one, and if you are ever anywhere near Euston Road on the first three Wednesdays and Thursday of the month, do pop into the Parallel Universe to say hello. It really is an out of space experience.

Deborah x

I’m staying put…

…not even the residual pain left over from my recent bone biopsy can pull me down. Yesterday Jarvis Cocker sent me an email, thanking me for the invite to my party and saying how much he enjoyed it. So we did eventually meet up and our kids were fully grown (well almost) but there wasn’t a fountain down the road or anywhere in sight. Last night we had supper with Colin’s parents and we got to watch the video footage of the party. I must say that Keith has done an excellent job. It’s not easy to capture the atmosphere of such an event, but I really do think Keith managed to do just that. I am going to try and edit it down a little bit over the weekend and then I shall show it through this blog. He also took over 200 photo’s so we have plenty to remind us of the evening.

I also got to see my darling little Elliot yesterday.
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What fun I am having.

Thank you so much Aunty Maureen for my CD of the CC Smugglers. They are an amazing band. It only took them a few minutes to learn the song that they then played with Jarvis singing. Hopefully you will get to see the video of our party soon but it may take the weekend for me to finish editing it.

The sun is shining here, now all I need is for a cure to be found and my world would be just perfect.

Have a great day every one

The photo’s are up on Facebook.

Deborah x

Still on a high…

…from Saturday night. Did I dream it or did Jarvis Cocker really sing Disco 2000 in our back garden, in the barn on our stage? Perhaps the drilling into my hip bone today will bring me back down to earth!

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Yes unfortunately I have to endure another bone biopsy today, but this time I have requested sedation, as the last one I had was pretty painful. This is the reason why I am up so early. We have to be at the hospital by 9am and its nil by mouth until after it’s been administered. I then have to hang around until my consultant appointment at 3.30 pm. Don’t these people know who I am? It’s me Deborah it never suited yer, my house was very small with wood chip on the wall. I don’t want to come down to earth, I’m staying exactly where I am!

If I haven’t already told you the CC Smugglers were amazing, ARE amazing. Not to mention how good a singer David Miils is! Come on Seb sign them up they will be big stuff in America and make you a fortune. Just don’t forget where you saw them first, at our home in our back garden on one hot Summer’s evening in July. I don’t mean to go on about it but you know, it’s me my name is DEBORAH.

I won’t apologise for repeating myself. It’s hard to move on, my Cancer has faded into insignificance. What Cancer? Did I tell you about the time Jarvis came to my party? How he sang along with my favourite band? Did I mention my good friend David Mills who played whilst the CC Smugglers attempted to toast marshmallows on our bonfire? How I danced and danced until sleep took over well past 2am?

Love from Deborah the first girl at school to get breasts (hmm I’m not too sure about that one)

pS if you are looking for me, I am floating up there somewhere on cloud number nine

WOW what a night!

Firstly I must apologise for the delay in posting but it has taken a couple of days to come back down to earth.

July 13th, was an evening to remember. It all started the day before as Production Plus an amazing events company, arrived to put up the staging, lighting and most importantly the disco ball. As the Friday evening drew in, some lovely friends, Ann and Patrick, arrived with bunting and some waterfall lights to make the set look even more spectacular. Tables and chairs were put out and the scene was set and who knew what would happen on the night of the party.

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Well the evening party to celebrate my 50th and raise money for Myeloma research, really couldn’t have been any better, as friends and family arrived laden with their picnics. Seeing our relatives from Sheffield was very special to both Kate and I, as was catching up with Jarvis, his sister Saskia and mum Chris. So many happy memories were shared and all seemed well with the world. As a surprise, friends and family had all learnt one of my most favourite songs and flash mobbed it for me. I wasn’t quite sure what was happening as a friends husband pulled me on to the dance floor but as it slowly sunk in to my alcohol filled head, I felt very honoured that new and old friends and family had all learnt my favourite song, ‘I hope you dance’ and were singing it especially for me. Then to top it all my childhood friend, Jarvis, took to the stage and sang Disco 2000 along with the amazing CC Smugglers, to me, for me, about me. How could that happen? I will never forget that moment for as long or as short of a time I have left on this planet. Thank you David for this footage.

http://www.facebook.com/l/IAQHaue9qAQHvBsnWsxH5MtxGLRbpMo60TZl_m2YQAYBubw/m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=FV_lzerVqDI&desktop_uri=%252Fwatch%253Fv%253DFV_lzerVqDI%2526feature%253Dyoutu.be

I am not sure how to express in words my gratitude. Thank you to you all just doesn’t seem enough but it’s a start so here I go, please accept my apology in advance if I leave any one out, it certainly won’t be intentionally.

To start with…

Thank you to you all for coming along and helping make the atmosphere just perfect. It was especially good to meet and make new friends some who I have made contact with through the Myeloma network and others from neighbouring villages.

Thank you to my soul mate Colin, loving sister Kate. mum Jill and best friends Sue and Angela who have not only helped to make the party a success, but who have been by my side every step of the way, witnessing the pain and tears, sharing the laughter and just holding my hand both literally and metaphorically. Without you this journey would have been even harder to bare. You have lifted my spirits when I have felt lost and supported not only me, but Colin and each other. I know this won’t stop here and I have confidence that you will be with me forever I love you all so very much.

A special thank you to Sue and Angela who contributed the wine for the party and to Kate who payed for the Porta Loo’s meaning even more money could be put in to the charity fund.

Thank you to my two lovely daughters Pollyanna and Jem who continue to make me proud. And to my lovely grandson who made, whoever met him on the night and the day after, smile. Thank you Pollyanna for contributing the sweets and nibbles and for buying so many raffle tickets!!

To my lovely brother Toby and his partner Jo for contributing the luxury Fortnum and Mason’s hamper to the raffle.

And a very special Thank You to Sebastian my lovely nephew who I love with all my heart, not only for all his contributions to the raffle but for flying over from Los Angeles to be with us all. Not to mention my rather extravagant sunglasses!

To the rest of my family, Charles and his friends, the family from up north, Jack and Jeremy who shared their time with us all, either before, at, or after the party.

Thank you to Production Plus for providing the staging and lightening at no cost, and a special Thank You to Andy who gives the best of hugs and for his and Vicki’s generosity .

Thanks to Ann and Patrick who put together the finishing touches the night before the party.

To Barbs and Jo who organised the flash Mob, and especially to Barbs for organising and chopping (with help from Kate and Kendra) all the fruit for the Pimms and strawberries for the desert. And to Jo who arrived very early on the Sunday morning and who had cleared up much of the mess before most of us got out of bed.

To Heather for all her help with buying up Costco’s and to her and her husband from
www.hertsfireplacegallery.co.uk
for providing the fire in a box which is a great idea for your garden especially on chilly evenings.

To Sonia and her son for lending us bunting and putting it all up.

To my very caring and thoughtful sister in law Lorna and her husband Gig, for helping in so many ways before, during and after the party. Along with Sophie who made all the cup cakes and helped with the raffle.

Thank you to Colin’s parents who also helped out before, during and after the party. With a very special Thank You to Keith who spent most of the evening taking pboto’s and filming the event. I can’t wait to see them all. He really is a fantastic photographer.

Thank you to all the other people who contributed raffle prises.

A very big Thank You to my good friend Allison who has not only been a great support to me but who baked me this amazing birthday cake, each flower was handmade. We rather reluctantly cut into it on Sunday and it tasted as good as it looks!

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A big Thank You also goes to Allison and Chris’s son Nick who very kindly contributed his time and skills to sort out all the electric’s in our barn so we could plug in the lighting and freezers

To David Mills,an amazing singer and I hope now he won’t mind me calling him friend. So many people commented on how good he was and he finished off the evening perfectly as the night drew to an end and we sat by the bonfire attempting, rather unsuccessfully,toasting marshmallows. If you need a singer for a party, wedding etc drop me an email and I will pass on his contact details or just google his name etc and you should find him on YouTube.

Another big Thank You to the CC Smugglers who really made the night especially when they backed up Jarvis Cocker and sang Disco 2000. They are such a talented group of lads but not only that, they are really nice guys who generously gave their time up for free so that we could raise even more money for charity. You can get hold of them or buy their CD by visiting their web site or Facebook page. Just follow the link below.

http://www.ccsmugglers.co.uk/

Thank You to Jarvis who not only turned up to my party with his mum Christine (or Aunty Christine as we used to call her), his son Albert, and beautiful girlfriend Kim and his sister Saskia and her very handsome son Felix. He actually, now this just made the night, sang Disco 2000 on our stage, at our house, to me. Now how cool is that! It was lovely to catch up and I was very grateful for my gift of a frame filled with old photo’s of us all as kids playing together. Thanks Aunty and thank you Jarvis for my book which I shall treasure forever.

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Thank you all as well for all the gifts I really didn’t expect to receive. To start with on Friday I received a parcel of a lovely teapot and selection of tea’s from Wendy and Sharon. It is perfect as both Colin and I love our cuppa, but after thanking all the Sharon’s and Wendy’s at the party, all of whom said it wasn’t them that sent it I am at a loss of who it came from ?

In my excitement cards got detached from presents and I am not sure who to thank for what. So I must apologise but a big THANK YOU to you all. I do know that I got the most amazing bouquet from Natasha, and a lovely basket of goodies from my good friend Julie Nash. I also received a lovely photo frame, candles, chocolates, slippers and foot creams, a perfect leather bound journal which I can’t wait to fill and a hamper of all my favourite things from my gorgeous cousin Mathew and his lovely wife Clare. Both Colin and I can’t wait to meet up with them again sometime soon.

July 13th really was a very special day. It was made special by all who were involved and everyone thoroughly enjoyed the evening.

I hope to be able to add more photo’s and video footage very soon. If you took any photo’s or film on the night I would be very grateful if you could send them to me at deborah.bone@mac.com

Thank you once again to all you lovely people

Deborah xxx

A trip down Memory Lane

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Me and Jarvis

Leafing through old photo’s with Uncle Ken and Aunty Judy.

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Me, Rebecca and little sister Kate

We had such a lovely time it was a shame to leave and Colin felt that the trip had really helped him as we talked about the effect of me having cancer was having on him, on the drive home.

We stopped on the way home for the lovely picnic lunch Aunty Judy had prepared. I then had an hour and a half’s sleep before we carried on with our journey home.

Picnic lunch provided by Aunty Judy

Picnic lunch provided by Aunty Judy

We arrived home at about 5pm to a very excited Frodo who has been well behaved for Kate.

Pain wise, how does one tell when one has reached the peak? My pain just seems to be getting worse and I really want it to start reducing now. The Fenytl patches make me feel much less dopy but the pain is worse so I must talk again to Louise and find out what our next step should be. Other than that there are no other plans for me today as yet.

Best wishes

Deborah

PS.
Scores on the board
Mental health = 5
Physical health = 8

Bloody Pain is preventing me in doing much more 😦

Book Proposal

I thought today I would share a book proposal I put together in 2004 (I can’t believe it was that long ago), the idea was to send it off to a publisher. If I decide to finish this book I would bypass a publisher and just self publish. One of my best friends has done just that and is earning nearly £100 every month. OK thats not enough to pay the mortgage but it’s a start.

I would be grateful for your thoughts, please be honest as I have other book ideas and don’t want to waste my time on this one if you don’t think it’s worth it.

So hear goes:

Welcome to the Meday Concept

An inspirational guide to taking control of time that will change you’re life forever.

Written for all those busy people who think they haven’t the time to read it!

Because….Smart People do Lunch!

What is ‘Welcome to the Meday Concept’ all about?

‘Welcome to the Meday Concept’ is a self help guide to improving emotional wellbeing. The term Meday is being used to illustrate a moment in time taken for oneself. This book is for anyone struggling to balance the demands of the workplace, school or family life or for those who just want to step off the treadmill and claim back some time for themselves.
The concept is accessible to anyone regardless of age, culture, religion, or gender. Very soon the idea will become common practice and people all over the world will be taking a Meday. Employers will encourage staff to take a Meday as they start to recognise its contribution to increased productivity and its ability to reduce stress. Single parents to busy executives, children to grandparents will soon be talking about their own unique Meday experiences.

This book will discuss the importance of the Meday and how it guarantees to change your life. Packed with invaluable advice, checklists and action plans it will provide a simple easy-to-understand guide on how to achieve the perfect Meday.
Taking small steps and periods of time out from a busy schedule will allow individuals to revaluate their strengths, and put some balance back into their lives.

The concept uses a solution-focused brief therapy approach by focusing on solutions rather than investigating problems.
It can be used by the reader alone or with the help of a therapist either way; by investing time in ones emotional, physical and spiritual wellbeing the improvement in quality of life can be unbelievable.

Who will buy this book and why?

This book is aimed at anyone interested in improving their emotional well being. Self help books have become increasingly popular over the past few years. The strongest target group most likely to buy this book will be women who want to make sense of their lives and slow down. It will also be of interest to professionals who want to explore its concepts in order to increase productivity in the work place and therapists who want to use its ideas in their own work.

This book is just the beginning and will be followed by more books on the subject such as; ‘365 Meday Ideas’, ‘Celebratory Meday’s’, and ‘How the Meday concept changed my life around’. There will be a range of Meday products and services for sale. The Meday concept is revolutionary and will change lives forever.

The Meday Concept will be talked about on morning TV and late night shows. The author will travel the world giving conferences for business professionals to women’s institutes.
I have no doubt that this books willing formula will make it a best seller with many by-products, making its author and publisher a household name and a tidy sum of money.

Contents

Chapter 1 – Introduction
Explanation of the Meday Concept
Why we need it? – Research into effects of stress on physical and mental health.
Benefits of following the Meday program
How it will work
Who this book is for – Check list with tick boxes

Chapter Two – Why taking time for yourself has never been so important
Living in today’s busy world
Juggling time
Pressures and its effects both long and short term

Chapter Three – What is a Meday and how it can help change your life
Taking time for ones self
Lunch breaks
Weekends
Annual Leave

Chapter Four – Recognising the signs/When to take a Meday
Symptoms of stress

Chapter Five – How to plan the perfect Meday
The importance of planning
Ideas for the perfect Meday
Charts to help you successfully plan your time

Chapter Six – How to help others achieve their perfect Meday
Using the concept in a therapy setting

Chapter Seven – Noticing the changes within yourself
Recognising the differences you’ve made to yourself and the effects on those around you
Sharing the secret

Chapter Eight – Lie back and enjoy the sunshine
Recap
Reflection
Evaluation

So there you have it, I have written quite a bit already but will need to hunt it out because all I could find so far was the above book proposal I put together.

Happy Tuesday another day we need to wrap up warm unfortunately.

Deborah x

Village Secrets and good friends.

Tonight’s the night, how exciting. Thanks to my sleeping tablets and strong pain killers I have had a good nights sleep so although feeling a little dopey at the moment I am raring to go.

I hope the cold weather doesn’t put people off attending. Some kind lady has baked a load of cup cakes and we will have a beauty therapist coming with her make up kit ready to give advice and add the finishing touches to your new look.

Who knows what you will find, I have tried to buy a mixture of designer clothes and shoes and it has been difficult not to hold on to some of them for myself.

I will have available some Village Secrets Style Sheets, to be filled in, this will help me to get hold of the right sort of clothes in the future if we decide to repeat the evening.

Thank you for all your support in helping to make this happen. When I was at school I didn’t have many friends. I hated every moment of school probably due to spending much of the time fearing the bullies who stole my dinner money and tried to burn my hair . Bullying is a big issue in schools and contributes to the increasing amount of young people who are being referred to our service for depression and low self esteem.

Now-a-days I seem to have lots of people I could call friends. Having Cancer has made me appreciate this even more and think that I must try to be a better friend myself.

Yesterday one of our best friends took time off work to come and clean our home. She also brought round a lovely homemade shepherds pie. We protested at first because it is hard to accept help, but it was so much appreciated and meant that both Colin and I could give our bodies the much needed rest in the afternoon.

We lay in front our lovely warm wood burning stove filled with logs that another new friends dropped around which meant that Colin did not have to go out chopping wood. How thoughtful is that!

Kate is my best friend as well as having the job of being my little sister. She readily puts other things on hold to help out and Colin was really appreciative of her support yet again at Wednesday’s hospital visit. And tonight she has agreed for me to host the first Village Secrets event in her home. So I must say a big ‘Thank You’ to her.

Sometimes work gets in the way of family and friends, having been forced to take time away from work has made me appreciate all the good things and people around me. When I do return to work I will make sure I get a better balance.

Try not to work too hard today.

I look forward to seeing many of you later.

Deborah x

A great night out..

..was had by us all as we listened to and watched the CC Smugglers in full swing.

They really are very talented and soon got the audience up on their feet dancing the night away.

Sebastian if you are reading this. CC Smugglers are going to be the next sought after band so get in quick, I can’t wait for you to see them in July.

Have a look at their facebook page https://www.facebook.com/ccsmugglers

Now I am even more excited about my summer charity birthday party.

Just in case you don’t know about it, it’s going to be one hell of a night in July. I don’t want to put too many details out publicly but if you want to know more and want a couple of the elusive £10.00 tickets just email me. We have 200 tickets in all with the first batch going to family and friends. All the money raised from the night will go to Myeloma Research.
There will be live music from CC Smugglers and the rather lovely David Mills, a chilli supper and a field to camp in if you fancy staying over night.

All we need is the sunshine and for you to be there.

Have a chilled out Sunday.

X

Two sleeping tablets later…

…and I managed 8 hours sleep, I want to jump out of bed with joy but feel the remnants  of my deliberate choice to increase to double my dose, holding me back.

Yesterday I was yet again reminded of the kindness of the human spirit. Another beautiful new scarf was left on my doorstep, and some lovely friends from the village delivered us a whole truck full of logs. This will make such a difference as Colin should not really be chopping away and putting further strain on his heart, and I am feeling the cold more than ever
So Thank You dear friends and village buddies.
Kate will drive and chaperone me to my final beetle juice and stomach injection of the week, today. This will give Colin a much needed break from it all, and a rest from my continuos steroid fuelled chatter.  On the journey I may get the chance to help Kate explore some of her excellent training ideas. I like helping others and feel disappointed when my body has other ideas and I have to go back into succumbing mode.
Tomorrow is my planned day of rest but I do have some other ideas for it so I am willing my body to synchronise well with my mind.
I am excited about the future.
Firstly I am really getting excited about the Village Secret event on a March 22nd I do hope many of you will come and support me. I hope I have enough clothes and shoes that you will like but if not we will just have a fun evening together any way.
Secondly I hope to deliver all the new scarves to the cancer centre next week, I should have received the white paper bags that I want to decorate by then and have written all the positive messages to accompany.
Thirdly I now have the NHS Change Day  to attend  on March 13th, so I can share my pledge and join with colleagues nationally who want to make a difference and improve the services we deliver to our patients.  I will just need to find myself a healthy chaperone who is  willing to wander around with a blown up baldy, (that’s how I feel sometimes), maybe I had better get the wig out!
Then it’s the BIG one, the prep for the Hinxworth Charity Birthday Festival. I want it to be the best night ever so I am busy visualising a lots of sunshine and plenty of people willing to lend us their patio heaters, just in case the air gets chilly in the evening .
I need to stay as well as possible, as does Colin, to acheive all of the above, so we are doing our best to follow instructions ( not my usual modus operandi) and succumbing when we really have to!
Please note,  this blog has been complied  in rather a drug induced state so I hope the above makes some sense.
Back on form tomorrow is the plan,
All the best
Deborah x